Friday, May 18, 2012

To The Class of 2016

I have never linked up for Friday's letters, and I thought my first go at this will all be letters written to my 8th grade students, as they get ready to leave me at the middle school and head off to the high school. This is what I would tell them.
Please forgive me if I have more school related posts than normal. The end of the school year really keeps my mind here at work.


Dear Students, We have 3 weeks left of school. I am more just as excited for mid-June to come as you are. Please don't act like a jack ass for these last couple of weeks, I want to remember you fondly.
Dear Class of 2016, You were born in 1998. Please don't try to tell me about the "good old days, when Tupac was alive." He died in 1996. You were not born.
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Dear Students Who Tell Me Tupac is Alive, Do you know who else people claim is alive? Elvis. Those people are nuts. Maybe Tupac and Elvis are kickin' it together, but probably not.
Dear Boys in 3rd Period, How are you in the "cool group?" You openly fart in class, without shame. I have NEVER had boys just fart in class the way you to do. Next time, please go out on the porch. You are making my classroom stink. (Seriously, when I was in middle school, if you farted you might as well have had a flesh eating bacteria. NO ONE would have talked to you.)
Dear Boys in 5th Period, I do not look like Brandi from Storage Wars.


Dear Students, Hi. I'm your health teacher. Please remember all that stuff I taught you in our sex ed unit, especially the part about abstinence. That was pretty important. Also, smoking cigarettes does not make you cool or attractive. Finally, please remember that washing your hands is the best way to prevent disease. Also, you cannot get pink eye from farting on a pillow. And stop watching 1000 Ways to Die. That show is stupid.

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8 comments:

Kara said...

Ok, this post was a crack up! It really does bother me when young teens act like they know about the Tupac days! And farting in class?!?! Oh, THE HORROR!

★ JASMINE ★ said...

hey girly! i saw you over on ashleys page! {newlyweds} and wanted to say i love your blog!

lovely letters as well! i'm your newest bloggy friend/follower/stalker ;)

say hi back sometime? <3

Sara K {SaigeWisdom} said...

SHUT UP! this is the funniest post I've read in a really long while... thank you. Glad to know I can't get pick eye from a pillow fart ;) My best friend is a high schools Foods & Socials teacher and her stories are 100% ridiculous - I love them. You just can't make that stuff up. You HAVE to do another edition of Dear Student, there are so many teacher bloggers out there you could do a link up of your own... HA-LARIOUS! xo

Courtney M said...

This post made me laugh so hard! My boyfriend now thinks I'm crazy...well crazier then before.

Good Luck getting through those last few weeks of the school year.

Hopefully you have a really fun summer planned!

Lissa @ The Looking Glass said...

HAH i love brandie and storage wars!! love the polka dot background :) found you via the link up! xo

Lissa @ The Looking Glass said...

HAH i love brandie and storage wars!! love the polka dot background :) found you via the link up! xo

Ashley Slater said...

oh, these were great! TUPAC! hahaha I hope you had fun writing your first letters! Loved ALL your letters, thanks for linking up with me this week!

xo,
ashley

Michelle said...

Hilarious!!! Kids at that age are SO obnoxious. And the farting?! Seriously?! I'm with you, that never would've gone over when I was in school. And Tupac. So funny.