"Suck it Amy." (about how to cut paper)
Boy: "Is it hard to wear high heels?"
"My dad is Pablo Escabar."
Me: "I don't think my husband would like that."
Ben: "Why? He doesn't like Islanders?"
Me: "No, he just doesn't like middle schoolers."
Ben: "I get that."
Student 1: "Have you ever heard of a red panda?"
Student 2: "Is it a bloody panda?"
"I don't have life insurance. I hope I don't die."
@ 10:07: "What time do we get out?"
"Cool, we have a half hour left."
Finally I will leave you with two conversations that were brought up in my leadership class. To preface this first one, you have to know that I teach in a very ethnically diverse school. Many times I am the only white person in the room.
A few weeks ago I jokingly asked the class whose mom was making me tamales. A few kids said they would bring some in when the one Caucasian boy in the room asked what a tamale was. This sent the majority of the class into a little frenzy describing what they were and then asking him if he had other types of Mexican food (carne asada, carnitas etc.) One of the other boys looked at him in all seriousness and asked, "What do white people eat?"
"Chicken. We eat lots of chicken."
Me: "Meatloaf." Then a girl raised her hand and asked this gem of a question: "Mrs. Coleman, don't white people eat a lot of pasta?"
This next one I had to sit back and laugh during the whole conversation:
Boy 1 raises his hand: "Do girls check out guys butts?"
Girl 1: "Sort of but its not like we turn all the way around like you boys do when you look at girls."
Girl 2: "But we can't really see anything because you guys always sag."
Girl 1: "Except when you wear basketball shorts."
Boy 1: "So are basketball shorts like yoga pants?"
I have always said that one reason I love my job is that it makes me laugh everyday. My job is pretty stressful, but its conversations like these that get me through the tough parts.